The way we narrate our lives determines the experience we have.
The beliefs we have about the world and ourselves determines how we interpret the events happening each day.
If we have a lens that looks at life with fear or anger, then our experience becomes filled with fear and anger. What we have on the inside, is what we see on the outside.
For example, think of a time you had a "bad day," where it felt like one unfortunate thing after another kept occurring. You woke up late, realized you forgot to buy creamer, spilt your creamer-less coffee on your shirt, and got stuck behind a school bus on the way to work.
We can all relate this right? Just one of those mornings.
Upon arrival to work, how much adversity do you think you could handle? Will you be in a space to handle the "little things" that arise throughout your day? Would forgetting a pen for your meeting push you to feel like exploding with anger & frustration? What would your awareness be tuned in to look for?
It would greatly depend on the conversation had with yourself about all that you've been experiencing. Is it a victim mindset? "This always happens to me." Is it a critical and punishing mindset? "I deserve this, I shouldn't have stayed up so late last night."
If these are the mindsets you hold, then this theme will more than likely continue throughout the day. Maybe even the week, month, or a lifetime. Constantly bringing events into your life that feel like a battle.
But what if you offered yourself patience and understanding? What if the conversation was more matter of fact?
"Whoops I woke up late, I'm going to do my best to get ready and be out the door ASAP."
"Oh shoot I forgot creamer, I'll pick it up on the way home from work today."
These narrations are different than the former. They simply note what has occurred and no assumptions are made about ones worthiness. The event is acknowledged, no judgements are made, and life moves on with a clean lens.
With this mindset, we aren't dragging the past with us to the present moment. This allows us to see our experience a bit more for what it actually is.
Waking up later than planned, forgetting to buy creamer, and driving behind a school bus. These things are no more than what they sound like. Waking up late doesn't deem you lazy, forgetting creamer doesn't make you irresponsible, and driving behind a school bus doesn't mean you are the unluckiest person on the planet. Each thing is what it is. Do not attach any meaning to them.
With this example, you can see that how you label and narrate the things happening throughout your day have the power to influence your experience.
So what to do with this information?
Use it to your advantage!
Observe how you talk about what occurs in your day. No judgements. Just listen. See if there are any patterns.
A good way to start is by noticing when you are feeling any intense emotions. This can be a flag to grab our attention. Take inventory of what emotion you are feeling, and take note of how you are talking about the event(s) that is causing you to feel that particular emotion.
The story is what is causing the emotion(s).
Change the story, change the emotion.
You have the power to influence your life. Are you taking advantage of this?
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